The Leader's Role in a Ward Member's Divorce | An Interview with Noelle McBride

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Noelle McBride is a professional motivational speaker and teacher with over 20 years of experience counseling and teaching women in groups and individually. She currently leads women in gospel-based workshops that are focused on overcoming the trials and hardships of divorce. She also serves as an ordinance worker in the Seattle Temple and in her stake Relief Society presidency. After having been blessed with three children during a 17-year marriage, Noelle went through a difficult and heartbreaking divorce. Notwithstanding this hardship, she experienced much healing and hope in her personal life, through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Desiring to help other women navigate the same trial, Noelle shares the promises and peace of the gospel in her first published book, Beauty for Ashes: Divorce and the Latter-day Saint Woman.

Highlights

03:15 Noelle explains why she wrote her book and what led her to write it 04:30 Noelle shares her story of marriage, divorce, being single, and getting remarried 06:40 What was the breaking point in the marriage? 08:00 How do you know you’re healed? What does that feel like? 10:30 Divorce is like the death of a marriage. There is a grieving process to go through. 11:15 When you marry someone your hearts are knitted together. Divorce rips them apart. True healing of your heart only comes through Jesus Christ not outside sources. 12:25 Noelle served a mission of sorts after her divorce. When she wasn’t with her children she would go out with the sister missionaries. She followed a routine similar to the missionaries to aid her in her healing. 16:00 Sometimes when we are hurting and grieving we seek for outside sources instead of going to Christ 19:30 Concepts and questions that leaders can ask to help someone going through a divorce 21:30 Noelle shares things that leaders did in her ward that helped her get through her divorce 24:00 The power of being present and just sitting with someone 26:30 As leaders we need to keep members’ names safe. Allow people to share the details of their situation that they want to share. 28:45 Noelle shares the dynamics of staying in the same ward as her ex husband and how she navigated it. She always had someone to sit with. 33:10 What a leader should do when a man or woman comes in and says they are getting divorced. Leaders need to respect personal revelation and allow them to have space and silence to receive revelation. 40:20 Kurt shares his experience as a bishop working with divorcees. Bishops should encourage people to get legal counsel and therapy. 44:20 The doctrine of forgiveness when it comes to divorce 50:00 Noelle shares her experience with therapy and the help she received from her bishop 57:20 Use single brothers and sisters in service 1:03:00 How can leaders utilize Noelle’s book? 1:06:45 Noelle shares how her divorce brought her closer to the Savior

Links

Beauty for Ashes: Divorce and the Latter-day Saint Woman Read the TRANSCRIPT of this podcast Watch on YouTube Get 14-day access to the Core Leader Library

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Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, J. Devn Cornish, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Whitney Johnson, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, DeAnna Murphy, Michael Goodman, Richard Ostler, Ganel-Lyn Condie, and many more in over 500 episodes.