Bonnie Lyman has a BA in Elementary Education, is the parent of five “grown up kids”, and a certified life coach. She has served as a ward Relief Society, Primary, and Young Women president, as a stake Young Women president and Primary counselor, a youth Sunday School, Primary, and Relief Society teacher, and as a mission medical coordinator and a music coordinator. Bonnie and her husband served in the Kenya Nairobi Mission as service missionaries before she launched her coaching business in 2019, and she now works with women struggling in their relationships with their adult children.
02:15 Introduction to Bonnie and her mission with her husband.
04:30 Bonnie talks about what she does and navigating life with adult children.
08:15 Bonnie talks about the biggest concerns that parents have with adult children. Most parents are concerned about their children leaving the Church and how to deal with it.
11:45 As parents to adult children remember that your only job is to love them.
12:15 One of the biggest things that parents of adult children struggle with is their children’s choices. They think that their children’s choices are a reflection of their parenting.
19:00 Remember that your kids have agency. As parents we get stuck knowing what our responsibility is as a parent and when to let our kids exercise their agency.
21:30 Sometimes we have to surrender to God and remember that He is the all knowing parent. We have to stay out of God’s business.
25:30 Bonnie gives her advice on how parents can deal with different behaviors from not moving out to drugs and alcohol.
31:50 We depend too much on our adult children to meet our needs. We are responsible for fulfilling our own needs. For example:
- Wanting equal time for holidays
- Wanting your children to call you everyday
34:35 How Bonnie would coach a parent wanting their children to fulfill their needs.
- Identify what they were feeling and the thought that was creating that feeling
40:45 What can parents do who have children who have completely severed the relationship?
46:50 What kind of a relationship do you have with yourself? The more you accept yourself, the more you can accept others for who they are.
The Leading Saints Podcast gets over 300,000 listens each month and has nearly 10 million total downloads as part of nonprofit Leading Saints’ mission to help latter-day saints be better prepared to lead. Learn more and listen to any of the past episodes for free at LeadingSaints.org.
Past guests include Emily Belle Freeman, David Butler, Hank Smith, John Bytheway, Liz Wiseman, Stephen M. R. Covey, Julie Beck, Brad Wilcox, Jody Moore, Tony Overbay, John H. Groberg, Elaine Dalton, Tad R. Callister, J. Devn Cornish, Dennis B. Neuenschwander, Anthony Sweat, John Hilton III, Barbara Morgan Gardner, Blair Hodges, Ryan Gottfredson, Greg McKeown, DeAnna Murphy, Michael Goodman, Richard Ostler and many more in over 700 episodes.
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