Jeff Borders joined The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints at the age of 19, and since then has had many opportunities to serve in various capacities. His wife, Crystyne, was integral to his conversion while they were dating, and he believes her to be one of the best missionaries he has ever met. When not serving at church, Jeff works as the manager of Respiratory Therapy and Clinical Informatics at a rural hospital in Eastern Washington, and as the station captain for his local volunteer fire station. He has a passion for educating and co-instructs many of the training classes at his hospital for nursing and respiratory staff.
Enter Jeff…
We all have heard the adage that you should never turn down a Church calling. I would agree that we should consecrate our time, talents, and energy. I believe callings are never convenient and that callings can and should stretch us. Whether it is spoken of by Church leaders, or something internal in us as we strive to live our covenants, wrestling with a calling is something we could potentially run into someday, depending on our situations.
It could be easy to judge that those who say no to a calling are not following through with the covenants they made in the temple of consecration and sacrifice. Or they just don’t understand that the call came from the Lord. Or they are just unwilling to serve. But what if it was none of those that led to a person seriously considering whether they could accept a calling or not?
What if the bishopric member or the bishopric doesn’t have all the information? I can think of several times after meeting with people that a call wasn’t extended because of some new piece of information the person shared.
In an interview for Church News, Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf said the following regarding information:
“Information brings inspiration. You have to collect information and then you are in a position to receive revelation when you connect to the Spirit.”
Misconceptions
Having served in two bishoprics, I’ve had the opportunity to extend callings, and I would say my approach changed as I learned and developed in my calling. First off, there are a couple of things I think are misconceptions about callings.
- Misconception #1: There is One Specific Person for a Calling – It is sometimes thought that there is only one person who can fill this calling.
Reality: To my knowledge, God doesn’t have a chalkboard in Heaven where he moves around people in the callings they are supposed to be. (This doesn’t preclude foreordination of certain things.) - Misconception #2: Bishoprics Receive Direct Revelation – It’s sometimes believed that direct, overwhelming, lighting bolt-like inspiration is received for every person in every calling.
Reality: In my experience, we prayed for direction at the beginning of the meeting, did our best to study what needed to be done, came up with our best solution, and moved forward, asking for confirmation. Because of that, some callings were logistical in nature. Does it make it any less a call from God? No. The bishopric prayed for inspiration and acted under the keys and authority of the bishop to move forward, trying to interpret the will of the Father through mortal imperfect servants. - Misconception #3: It’s a Big Deal to Decline a Calling – Some folks think that turning down a calling is a big deal, but turning down invitations to speak or pray is not.
Reality: While people tend to believe that you don’t turn down callings, people, in general, have no issues turning down opportunities to speak in church or do service for others. And often, I would say I prayed more for the specific talk and person to give the talk than for some callings. So, the wrestle of saying no isn’t a consistent wrestle around all aspects of the Church. - Misconception #4: Because of Revelation, the Bishopric Knows All – Some think that through revelation, the bishopric knows all they need to know to receive revelation regarding individual callings.
Reality: Bishoprics can’t know everything about every individual’s circumstances. It’s just not feasible. Meaning, more information is always better. - Misconception #5: You Don’t Need To Pray About a Calling – It is believed by some that you shouldn’t take time to pray about the calling; you should just accept it right on the spot.
Reality: In my experience, it is rare that a call must be filled immediately. Those occasions do exist, but like most bureaucratic systems, sometimes calls move glacially slow. Bishoprics should encourage those receiving a call to pray about it if there is any hesitancy.
The Formalities of Extending a Calling
The general handbook of instructions has this to say about extending callings:
“Leaders seek the guidance of the Spirit in determining whom to call (see also 4.2.6).
They also consider:
- The member’s worthiness (as determined in an interview).
- Gifts and abilities the member has, or could develop, to bless others.
- The member’s personal circumstances, including his or her health and work.
- The impact the calling may have on the member’s marriage and family.
Each calling should bless the people who are served, the member who serves, and the member’s family. Callings also give members opportunities to grow.
Members are blessed for the sacrifices they make to serve in the Church. However, a calling should not place undue burdens on individuals and families. Nor should callings make it difficult for members to fulfill their employment responsibilities.”
What constitutes an undue burden for some may not cause an undue burden for others, so how do we discover what an undue burden might be for someone?
Creating Balance
All of those things being said, is there a way to create balance for those extending callings and those receiving callings? Is there a way to make sure the revelatory trump card isn’t used, whether intentionally or unintentionally? Is there a way to make sure that we are not placing undue burdens on individuals or families, or making it difficult to fulfill employment responsibilities? Here are a couple of ways I learned over my time to create some balance.
Tips For the Bishopric Member
There are no hard and fast rules on how to extend a calling, but here are a few tips to help the process go smoothly and with compassion.
- Information leads to revelation.
- When I would reach out to someone to extend a call, I would often say, “I would like to meet with you about a calling.” No one likes to be in the “Surprise! Here’s your calling” scenario. Just be upfront about what you want to meet about.
- Before extending the call, meet with the person. Ask the person if there is anything in their lives that would hinder them from fulfilling the call. Sometimes jobs prevent members from fulfilling certain callings. It is the nature of work. For instance, someone who works every night during the week probably wouldn’t be able to fulfill the role of a youth advisor. Or a person who works every Sunday would not be a good candidate for a Sunday School teacher.
- Be aware that circumstances change and the information we thought we knew may or may not be up to date.
- If there are circumstances that prevent the calling from functioning, be sensitive to that and consider not extending the call.
- Take the information back to the bishopric and evaluate with the new information. You may still feel prompted to move forward, but again, information leads to revelation.
- Explain the calling, what their duties will be, and most importantly never forget to explain the support that will be provided in the calling.
- If the person seems hesitant, invite them to pray about it and follow up with them. Remember, this isn’t a gospel of compulsion. Allow the person to receive a witness of the call.
- Consider that someone may be battling the mindset of never turning down a calling, even though they know they may not be able to fulfill it. Some people aren’t comfortable sharing their feelings.
- Be careful not to use the revelatory trump card. “We prayed about it, so this is what needs to be done.”
- Be in tune with the Spirit in the meeting.
Tips for Members Regarding Callings
The opportunity to serve can bless and expand our skills and testimony. Here are a few things to consider when you are having discussions with a bishopric member about a potential calling.
- Information leads to revelation.
- Be open to receiving a calling.
- Be open and honest if you have circumstances that would make fulfilling the calling impossible or difficult. Remember, the bishopric doesn’t have all the information in the world.
- If you have concerns, be willing to share them.
- If you are feeling unsettled, consider taking some time to pray about the calling. Pray for peace and confirmation.
- If you are still feeling unsettled, counsel with the bishopric member regarding your concerns. Again, callings don’t generally need to be sustained immediately.
- You may face the struggle of not wanting to turn down a calling, but still feeling like you can’t fulfill the calling/assignment. These feelings do not make you less righteous. Everyone has a wrestle. It’s okay.
- If you can’t fulfill the specific calling, let the bishopric member know where you can serve.
- Consider a trial run and reevaluate the calling three to six months down the road.
- Do everything you can to be in tune with the Spirit.
The Work of the Lord
We are all called to the work and sometimes in areas of the vineyard that we have no desire or even experience to work in. We, however, must consider making sure to keep the Spirit involved in both sides of the calling discussion.
Because this isn’t a compulsory gospel, we have the ability to choose, but it should always be with the Spirit guiding and directing us.
We should also be willing to admit we may have the calling wrong, knowing we are imperfect people trying to interpret revelation.
For those receiving a calling, we need to be willing to step into uncomfortable spots that stretch us. These are not mutually exclusive ideas. The Spirit will guide and direct us as we turn our hearts and minds toward God and serve Him to the best of our ability.
Remember, information leads to revelation.
